Proof of Castro's Death

La Contra Revolución can now offer unequivocal proof of Castro’s death.

Fidel Castro, the Cuban Revolutionary failure was killed in a freak cigar smoking /car accident in 1965. Fidel dropped his lit cigar on his Russian –made polyester fatigues while driving his jeep in the outskirts of Guanabacoa, Cuba. Ablaze and in excruciating pain the tyrant lost control of his vehicle and crashed into a Royal Palm where he suffered mortal injuries.

Leaders in the Cuban exile community in Miami with the help of the CIA, replaced Castro with a double who happens to be his third cousin from Spain, Pepe Castro, They did this because of the almighty buck. By 1965 Miami was already a growing Cuban-American city. Had the Cubans in the island found out Castro died, they would have stopped risking their lives in the shark infested waters of the Florida straights to reach Miami and wear chintzy gold chains, polyester guayaberas, smoke cheap cigars and drink bad rum. This would have caused the Cuban Exiles, now called the Miami Mafia to loose all their customers for the aforementioned goods.

Clues of Castro’s death can be found in many places, among them, the Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band cover which shows a group of mourners standing in front of a freshly dug grave. Around the "grave", there are several symbols, including a doll with a cracked head that represents Castro’s fatal injury; a toy car on one knee and a bloody left-handed driving glove (Fidel is left-handed). Within the flowers comprising the guitar shape, the word "Raul" followed by a question mark can be seen. Lastly, Fidel appears to be the tallest in this picture but in real life he is not the tallest, suggesting that the person in the picture is not really him.

Castro is the only person holding a wooden instrument, representing his coffin, and the instrument is the only one that is black, representing death. The instrument is a cor anglais, the only instrument shown on the cover which is not used in a marching band. Fidel's "true" instrument would have been the Colt 45, which is sitting unused at feet of the wax figure of Ringo. Fidel is the only person with a hand over his heart, a religious symbol for blessing the dead. There is also an open hand immediately above Fidel’s head. In some cultures this represents that the person is dead or about to die.